This guy’s got bells!
Why am I such a misfit?
Too timid for the cool kids; too weird for the mainstream. Wondering where my work truely fits in.
Perhaps I don’t let myself say what is fighting to come out, programmed to censor myself, preoccupied with what others will think and say, struggling against some expected confines of what a woman my age should be (whatever the fuck that is) that I absorbed along the way. Worried about embarrassing my sons with my subject matter (But they’ve told me they don’t care if I paint dolls with vaginas!)
Scarred and scared from the manipulation and betrayal of a most recent relationship (But I kicked his ass out! I was triumphant! But the damage remains.) Semi-paralyzed with anxiety, doubt, insecurity… Fuck that! I’ve got “bells” too! I’m gonna put on my happy clown face and paint them!
2 thoughts on “This guy’s got bells!”
July 9, 2017 at 3:43 pm
In my opinion it is impossible to hold your talent down.
July 9, 2017 at 7:30 pm
I hear you regarding your fear and anxiety especially as regards abusive relationships. I’m sorry you suffered that and glad you are free from it. That doubt plagued me for many years and will occasionally still raise its head. May peace and strength be yours. Oh… and bells!!